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Also, choose a safe word, one unrelated to sex either of you can say to halt what's happening. It can be easy to move into patterns in a sexual relationship, "especially if a couple starts out with little sex information or strong opinions about what 'normal' sex is, leading them to reject many erotic options," says Dr. If your sexual playbook becomes staid, she suggests talking to a sex therapist or coach—or doing some reading. Failure to launch and premature party ending are touchy subjects.

To start the limits conversation, exchange one idea each about something you'd like to experience. Best case: There are two new options on your sexual menu," says Dr. "Some books, like , are made to be browsed together, giving you spicy ideas and info to boot," says Dr. "Most guys don't want to talk about it while in bed," says Joel D.

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